When it comes to dating and relationships, society tends to focus on attraction and commitment. However, we need to discuss more the work it takes to strengthen attraction and commitment. That includes lifestyle factors that determine a couple’s compatibility.
Compatibility goes beyond the same interests and hobbies. It should involve values and goals because those influence the kind of lifestyle you want to live. So if you’re wondering why your past relationships failed, the issue was probably more than just falling out of love or infidelity. Perhaps, your clashing lifestyles led to your fallout, which eventually caused your feelings to change.
Of course, no matter how incompatible you are, it’s not an excuse to break your partner’s trust. But if you’d look at the bigger picture, you’d realize that relationship issues, including infidelity, can be influenced by your poor compatibility. Therefore, when you’re ready to move on, consider working with a professional matchmaker. They’d help you find someone with lifestyle factors that can strengthen your relationship, such as:
1. Good Money Habits
When you’re forced to shoulder your partner’s financial obligations, you’re setting the relationship up for failure. Money issues are a leading cause of divorce and breakups.
A cheapskate isn’t any better, either. Their extreme frugality may force you to sacrifice some of your needs. It will negatively affect the quality of your life.
Your special someone should strike a balance between spending wisely and saving money. That would allow you to manage your joint finances better. Your arguments about money will be minimal, if not nonexistent at all. Even if you manage your money differently from your partner, at least they’d be a good influence in your life because they won’t enable your risky spending patterns.
To know if your significant other manages their money well, don’t make money a taboo in your conversations. Besides, money topics don’t have to be serious and boring. Start by casually mentioning your latest purchase or the financial goal you just achieved. By doing so, you’d open the door for deeper financial talks. If your partner seems defensive or evasive regarding money, consider that a possible red flag. A healthy relationship should not harbor any secrets, especially about money.
2. Similar Everyday Lives
It’s okay to date an accountant if you’re in sales. Since both occupations are normally office-based, it allows you and your partner to have the same schedule every day. You work during the day and rest at night, which would also serve as your bonding time together.
But if you’re an office employee, and they are a TV personality, no doubt, you’d struggle to find time for each other. Chances are they’re working during your free time, and vice-versa. While some couples can make varying schedules work, it’s not for everyone. A conflicting schedule can affect your connection, not to mention your health. If spending time with your partner means losing sleep you’re already lacking, you’re probably better off with someone else.
3. Healthy Anger Management
People have different ways of blowing off steam. Some like to drink, while some would instead yell or get physical with something or somebody. If your partner is the former, they’re probably a catch. They won’t likely lay a hand on you or treat you badly just because of an ill temper.
However, researchers determined that we are more likely to take our anger out on the person we love. If you’re the type to rant to your friends, odds are you’d do it to your significant other as well. Try to tone it down because your partner may feel like your punching bag.
4. Well-organized and Clean
Nobody likes to date someone who doesn’t shower. But sometimes, we only discover someone’s hygiene when we live with them. If you found someone who looks after themselves well, you’re in luck. A clean and well-organized person is usually put-together. They’d probably help you out with chores, too.
5. Similar Priorities and Pace in Life
If you want to have kids, your partner should prioritize family over friends or leisure. They should also want children at the same as you. This indicates that you’re reaching your goals at the same pace, preventing issues that lead to growing apart.
You don’t have to go after the same goals, but they should at least be aligned. For example, if you want to be a millionaire, your partner should chase after a high-paying job or a business. They can’t be going after things that would deplete your savings.
Basically, compatible partners are on the same page. They still have disagreements, but they settle them healthily. They see each other as individuals but don’t treat them as an outsider in their life.